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Just lost a friend

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I just need to vent my feelings....

 

Today I just lost a friend. One minute we were talking, and then he called me some words that would get me banned in a heartbeat if said on this forum. From there the train of friendship crashed into a brick wall.

 

But then of course, I came across someone that I know and I was able to vent my frustrations to with caring from him. I feel a lot better after venting my ideas.

 

I'm still a little unstable, do you have any idea of what to do?

 

Thanks in advance!!

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Unless you or he/she said something that can never be forgiven, let some time pass, call him or her up and apologize and move on.  I've had things happen with close friends in the heat of the moment and either I or my friends contacted me, apologized and we moved on.  Things happen and sometimes tempers boil over.

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Not to undermine your situation, but when I saw the title I almost immediately assumed death.

 

At any rate just give him time. If he has any self respect he'll contact you eventually. Sorry I'm of no more help. At the risk of sounding condescending, feel free to shout a PM if you care to elaborate a bit.

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How old are you ? (i'm not being insulting when I ask this... I'm asking because my answer pretty much varies depending on how old you are)

How strong was this friendship (in other words, how long did you know him for) ?

Do you yourself think this friendship is repairable and/or worth saving? (which is all that really matters)

 

 

^^ With those questions unanswered, I'm probably the wrong person to seek advice from if you're looking for a feel good type of response when it comes down to this..... See, because I'm not the type to lose sleep after I lost a friend & I have never felt the need to vent to someone else about the friend I lost, to make myself cool off or w/e in hopes of getting that person back as a friend (having lost a friend has happened more than once w/ me btw).... You only get one chance to come out of pocket with me, for me to have a totally different view of you - and I've been this way since childhood..... If you did something that (to me) wasn't friend worthy, you were never a friend in the first place - and things will only go south from that point..... I don't forgive people & I sure as hell don't forget a bad deed....... That may sound f***ed up to a lot of people, but with me, it is what it is.....

 

I'm an easy person to try to make friends with, but I'm also an easy person to lose a friendship with - If you f*** up....

With the friends I do have, I haven't gotten into a heated argument or fight with ONCE....

 

 

 

...on a different note, upon reading the thread title, I also thought this was about a friend of yours that might've passed away..... At least that's not the situation you have on your hands......

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I had a good friend from hs years ago, we knew each other since freshman year. He did some stupid prank (nothing major and was typical) on me during junior year and i (having a bad day prior to lunch) slipped up uttering some hateful word and he just gave me the solent treatment to the day we graduated in senior year. Some years later we got back in touch and he forgave me and we patched things up. However, i haven't heard back from him since then.

 

My point is that sometimes people might say stuff they don't mean to say and might take things very personally. If the person is someone you really know and might not have a history of being 'hateful', i guess you should give it as much time as it takes for everything to boil over. And sometimes maybe it's not something you can do.

 

As for the title, a little much as i thought it was like the person died.

Edited by Grand Concourse
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Unless you or he/she said something that can never be forgiven, let some time pass, call him or her up and apologize and move on.  I've had things happen with close friends in the heat of the moment and either I or my friends contacted me, apologized and we moved on.  Things happen and sometimes tempers boil over.

Meant to say something that can't  be forgiven...  And yeah like the others said I was thinking death as well... 

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Friends come and go, if I recall you're still young so I guess the experience is different.  But for me now a days, I'm usually in that IDGAF type of personality and if I lose the friend, then he/she wasn't a friend at all.  But of course, after some time passes either we talk back and set things straight or it's who the hell are you the next few months.

 

The most awkward moments are when that specific person is part of the daily group you usually hang out with.  Had that before and after 1 year of silence we set things straight and went back to the way it used to be.

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Friends come and go, if I recall you're still young so I guess the experience is different.  But for me now a days, I'm usually in that IDGAF type of personality and if I lose the friend, then he/she wasn't a friend at all.  But of course, after some time passes either we talk back and set things straight or it's who the hell are you the next few months.

 

The most awkward moments are when that specific person is part of the daily group you usually hang out with.  Had that before and after 1 year of silence we set things straight and went back to the way it used to be.

A good friend of mine from college got me pissed one day... Was crashing at his place while I took care of some business at the university for the study abroad trip... He made a snide remark that set me off... I packed my sh*t called car service and was on the next bus to NYC since I was planning on going to the city soon anyway to get my visa process wrapped up, but he just accelerated that trip considerably.  Didn't say anything to him either... He knew he pissed me off royally.... Pretty much had lost contact with him... Fast forward a few years and I'm chatting with this chick via IM and she's like yeah there's this dude that's looking for you and I'm like who could that be and then she goes on telling me how he says you were good friends and all and then I figured it all out.  She was someone I also knew in college, but I had no idea my buddy knew her. So I'm like alright fine... Let me search for this motherf****r via IM and that's what I did.  Wasn't like I had forgotten his screen name... Just deleted it.... lol  

 

So much time had passed that I had pretty much forgiven him but the fact that he was looking for me let me know that he knew that he f*cked up and essentially was looking to make amends so I accepted his half-ass apology because overall the guy's got a good heart even though he can be a d*ck at times. We've been friends for a good 15 years almost so it's one of those things where sh*t happens and you get heated but you both understand each other so much that words don't really have to be spoken.  We're like brothers so we both know that we have each other's back should we need one another no matter how long we haven't hung out or what's going on.  Those type of friends are hard to come by...

Edited by Via Garibaldi 8
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