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mark1447

10 Ways Microsoft's Retail Stores Will Differ From Apple Stores

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I love numbers (2) and (4) xD

 

Microsoft announced plans to open retail stores, hoping to boost visibility of many of its products and its brand. The move seems to be an effort to mimic the success that Apple has had with its retail stores. The news is just too tempting not to have some fun with. So here are some yet-to-be-officially-revealed details about the Microsoft stores.

 

1) Instead of Apple's sheer walls of glass, Microsoft's stores will have brushed steel walls dotted with holes -- reminiscent of Windows security.

 

2) The store will have six different entrances: Starter, Basic, Premium, Professional, Enterprise, and Ultimate. While all six doors will lead into the same store, the Ultimate door requires a fee of $100 for no apparent reason.

 

3) Instead of a "Genius Bar" (as Apple provides) Microsoft will offer an Excuse Bar. It will be staffed by Microsofties trained in the art of evading questions, directing you to complicated and obscure fixes, and explaining it's a problem with the hardware -- not a software bug.

 

4) The Windows Genuine Advantage team will run storefront security, assuming everybody is a thief until they can prove otherwise.

 

5) Store hours are undetermined. At any given time the store mysteriously shuts down instantaneously for no apparent reason. (No word yet on what happens to customers inside).

 

6) Stores will be named Microsoft Live Retail Store with PC Services for Digital Lifestyle Enthusiasts.

 

7) Fashioned after Microsoft's User Account Control (UAC) in Vista, sales personnel will ask you whether you're positive you want to purchase something at least twice.

 

8) Xbox 360 section of the store will be organized in a ring -- which will inexplicably go red occasionally.

 

9) DreamWorks will design a scary in-store theme park ride called "blue screen of death."

 

10) Store emergency exits will be unlocked at all times so people can get in anytime they want even if the front doors are locked.

 

SOURCE: PC WORLD

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Nice ones!

 

This is a joke. Msft is bleeding money. Hopefully dead soon.

 

- A

 

 

nah im lauging with ketchup on me lol

 

thanks dudes

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Nice ones!

 

This is a joke. Msft is bleeding money. Hopefully dead soon.

 

- A

lol They won't be going dead anytime soon. Apple will go bankrupt before Microsoft does.

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Microsoft is a joke.

 

if its a jk, then y r u using Windows? lolZ

 

Plus MSFT is the one who made the PC Software lol

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MSFT is a key part of the Economy... If MSFT dies, no HP, no Dell, no Gateway, no Acer, no eMachines, no Alienware, no VooDooPC, no Asus and no Velocity Micro will exist... Unless if Apple save one of them or they switch to Linux...

 

Key part of the economy? There is sun, apple, ibm, various linux distributing companies, etc etc. Microsoft is no more vital to the economy than wax figurines. Just another company. Most of the internet does not use windows also, and equipment/OS changes are in most cases easily made and simple. :)

 

- A

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Lol. This gave me a good laugh. :)

 

It may be true that M$ is turning out to be more of a joke since XP was the next greatest thing. Unless they really make a good comeback with their products starting with Win 7.

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I have to disagree.

 

Well, Microsoft got so many stuff From Applications to Zune and so many softwares support Microsoft Windows, (more than Mac)... So I feel that if Microsoft collapses, the world of tech will forever be changed... And Apple, Sun, IBM and Linux are not the key economy companies, only bits of them drive the economy and world... And Microsoft is not wax figures...

 

I calaculate, millions of people will lose jobs if Microsoft collapses...

 

 

Zune is a joke. From the day apple came out with the macintosh microsoft has been trying to copy them. Microsoft has nothing innovative to offer. I think the should die.

 

- A

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Key part of the economy? There is sun, apple, ibm, various linux distributing companies, etc etc. Microsoft is no more vital to the economy than wax figurines. Just another company. Most of the internet does not use windows also, and equipment/OS changes are in most cases easily made and simple. :)

 

- A

Pulling those figures out of your ass? :) Stop sucking on the Steve Jobs/Apple kool-aid. Microsoft has a 90+ hold on the the PC market. Apple is barely more than 4%. If you are referring to Servers, majority of them run Windows Server OSes or a variant of UNIX/Linux, haven't seen any company run anything on any Apple OS. Also, remember, Microsoft isn't only in the OS market. They are involved in a lot of other markets. If Microsoft were to crash (highly unlikely) it would cost lots of jobs and would have a big impact on the economy.

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Zune is a joke. From the day apple came out with the macintosh microsoft has been trying to copy them. Microsoft has nothing innovative to offer. I think the should die.

 

- A

HA! What a joke. Forgetting the whole thing behind Apple copying their GUI from Xerox?

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HA! What a joke. Forgetting the whole thing behind Apple copying their GUI from Xerox?

 

The xerox interface was developed separately. Apple all ready had features such as click & drag on their interface when they visited parc. After the visit most of those engineers came over to apple.

 

As far as msft having 90% of the market, no. Home/office computing, maybe, but most servers do not run windows, because its just not secure & reliable enough.

 

For many years i was close friends with many old heads at apple or who used to work at apple in the early days. Sadly i now only know one, but they keep me informed on the (D)(L) about stuff, which i of course never tell to anyone else out of respect for the people at apple.

 

Msft has nothing, they never have, they never will. The only thing that makes their stuff look more attractive, is that the hardware their os ships on is inexpensive (read cheap junk) compared to apple. Apple does not have "over-priced" anything. You think you bought a dell, hp, etc? All made by the same company with different stickers on it in china. Apple makes a lot of their hardware in the usa, compared to the windows guys who import 100%.

 

It really is like comparing "authentic looking" homes with ones that actually are authentic. No comparison.

 

- A

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The xerox interface was developed separately. Apple all ready had features such as click & drag on their interface when they visited parc. After the visit most of those engineers came over to apple.

 

As far as msft having 90% of the market, no. Home/office computing, maybe, but most servers do not run windows, because its just not secure & reliable enough.

 

For many years i was close friends with many old heads at apple or who used to work at apple in the early days. Sadly i now only know one, but they keep me informed on the (D)(L) about stuff, which i of course never tell to anyone else out of respect for the people at apple.

 

Msft has nothing, they never have, they never will. The only thing that makes their stuff look more attractive, is that the hardware their os ships on is inexpensive (read cheap junk) compared to apple. Apple does not have "over-priced" anything. You think you bought a dell, hp, etc? All made by the same company with different stickers on it in china. Apple makes a lot of their hardware in the usa, compared to the windows guys who import 100%.

 

It really is like comparing "authentic looking" homes with ones that actually are authentic. No comparison.

 

- A

60% of servers run UNIX/Linux, the other 40% is Windows, which is more than can be said about OSX/Darwin. All hardware I've seen from Apple has had labels that state: "Designed by Apple in California, built in: 3rd world country". There goes YOUR weak point in regards to "quality". Seriously dude, stop being an Apple fanboy. Your "quality" Mac is not worth anymore than a cheap Dell.

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I'm an Apple user. But I run Window XP on VMWare Fusion because some things you can download off the web are PC only. Vista sucks. However XP is a good system. If you compare a Mac computer with an equivalent spec'd PC, and equivalent class (as in iMac vs the HP ONE because they are both all in ones) you will find that Macs are either the same price, or cheaper than their PC counterparts. Mac OSX is better than XP. I use both.

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I'm an Apple user. But I run Window XP on VMWare Fusion because some things you can download off the web are PC only. Vista sucks. However XP is a good system. If you compare a Mac computer with an equivalent spec'd PC, and equivalent class (as in iMac vs the HP ONE because they are both all in ones) you will find that Macs are either the same price, or cheaper than their PC counterparts. Mac OSX is better than XP. I use both.

 

Correct. Most people don't realize this.

 

- A

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Vista is a fine system. The issue with Vista are the idiots that don't know how to use it and the idiots that have never used it and just spread the lies from the idiots that can't figure out how to turn on their computers.

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Vista is a fine system. The issue with Vista are the idiots that don't know how to use it and the idiots that have never used it and just spread the lies from the idiots that can't figure out how to turn on their computers.

 

The problem is vista.

 

- a

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The problem is vista.

 

- a

 

I've used Vista since it came out and I've never had a single issue. It runs and performs better than any other Windows OS. Windows 7 has already surpassed all other OSes, including OSX. Stop being a Apple fanboy.

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